Stay-at-home Mom Survival Guide

I get to take care of those two right there everyday. What a privilege and what a learning curve! 

My journey as a stay-at-home mom begun nearly 3 years ago when I quit my Mon-Fri, stable, good-paying job 4 days before our little girl came into this world.  Since then I've done the stay-at-home mom thing full time, with a brief part-time run at Starbucks. That was only evenings so I was still home with our little munchkin(s) all day, every day. 

{Side note: You working mamas are incredible. That is hard stuff.}

Therefore, I've had some time to figure out a couple of methods to the madness in this "job" of being home with the kids.  It's challenges and rewards are like no other job I've ever had.  I agree with most when they say "I definitely wouldn't trade it for anything"; even though I've entertained the thought of trading it in, I've never actually gone through with it because at the end of the day I know it is where I am supposed to be. BUT that doesn't take away the kinks and difficulties of it. 

So, here you go...

Survival tips for the stay-at-home mom gig.

• Take care of your physical self. Brush your teeth, wash your face, clean your ears, take care of your nails, get your hair done, take showers, etc. You might be laughing at this tip, but in some seasons (depending on your kid(s) age), these "normal" things are not so "normal"! Right moms of newborns?! I know you are up with kids at night, up with kids at the crack of dawn, and they don't give you a break. But do these things. Because you're still worth taking care of. Your crying baby, toddler, kids, can whine or wait on you to take care of yourself. True story: I have to remind self of this still. And sometimes my crawling baby goes in the dry bathtub while I do the above because right now he likes to get in the toilet and trash and everything else. You just do what you have to do.

• Get dressed and/or put on make-up at some point in the day. What's that one sports saying? "When you look good you feel good, when you feel good you play good." I've found the same to be true in the stay-at-home mom arena. Putting on clothes that aren't pajamas or doing my make-up or my hair help me feel good about myself, plain and simple. When I feel good, I act good. Towards myself, towards my kids, towards my husband.  Disclaimer: Sometimes this doesn't happen until 1 in the afternoon. BUT, I know myself and if I stay make-up-less or in my grungy clothes until my husband gets home from work I feel like ICK.  So do yourselves a favor and help yourself feel good and remind yourself that you ARE a normal human even if you didn't leave the house :)

• Community. Have people you get together with (especially other mamas). They come over, you go over, you meet somewhere...whatever.  This will keep you a sane and healthy person. One of the most challenging things in my transition from the working world to home was being alone. Being alone sucks. Just reading those words makes me cringe. Don't be alone. I keep us pretty busy because that's how I like it. I get together at least once a week with friend(s) and their kids. It's the best. In addition I do bible study, we do the children's museum, the library, the park, local farms with animals to see. If you don't already have friends with babies/kids, yay you get to make some! Go to a MOPS group. Find a mom's group on Facebook that meets locally. Join a mom and baby work out group, kill two birds with one stone.  Go to your church's bible study and put your kids in childcare so you can have some adult time and make friends.  It might be awkward at first, but it'll be worth it. Cause you need mama friends. They'll save your life. 

• Outlet/hobby.  You have a baby, you're home with the baby, and you take care of that baby all the time, every day, every need. Baby, baby, baby. It's easy to loose yourself in that and forget what you like to do. So what do YOU like to do? Don't stop doing it. Or make sure you start doing it! Make space in your life and do it! I like to write. That's my outlet. And I like to work out and be fit. That's my other outlet. Have an outlet, you need it! And there's always time for it. Make time for it.

• Take care of your spiritual self. Jesus and your bible. Spend time in both. On the hard days when I'm totally exhausted or at the end of my rope, JESUS is what I stand on to be reminded of why I'm doing this. When I want to quit or when my heart is weary, the Word is what I look to to remind me of my calling and who I am in HIM. I am not weary, I just get weary. I am not short-fused, I just get short fused. And there is unending grace to be had with Jesus. Which I need a lot of in this gig! When  I am not spending sufficient time in my Bible, I'm toast. I don't have what it takes. I don't have much to give or be.  But oh when I'm drawing from the well that doesn't run dry, the possibilities to love and give are unending.  Also, babies are mostly takers, let's be honest. So when you'e spending a majority of your time with a taker and not a giver, you've got to be aware of your desperate need to be given to and filled up. I could write a whole other blog on this bullet point, but that's where I'll stop for this one. 

Without these things, I'm a crazy, unhappy, tired, worn out, short-fused, frazzled mom/wife/person.  Babies are such blessings. They are incredible. But they don't come with warning labels about how they will absolutely change your life and YOU. Especially if you go from working to staying home. Your life changes drastically. There's hardly a way to prepare for it, you kind of just learn through trial and error! Just like any other job, this one also takes time to find your stride in. By no means have I figured it all out, but I feel like I have found the things that allow me to do this job more graciously and joyously.